Performing my civic (jury) duty...

I am basically only writing this post because I have reached the end of the internet and a new level of boredom.  It's sometime around 2pm-ish and I have been sitting in the "jury holding room" at a Los Angeles courthouse and I will apparently have to sit here until 5pm making excuses as to why I can't serve on certain trials.

We're all just sitting here in silence.  Which is not what they said would happen on the jury duty initiation video in which they implied we would make life-long friends like this was jewish summer camp or something. There are a surprising number of hot dudes here so put on a bright green scarf so that they can better identify me when they write their craigslist missed connection ads later tonight.

I'm so bored I took a walk town the hall to look at all of the criminals and assholes who didn't pay their child support and discovered The Office for Name Changes and immediately my mind started racing.  Do you think I should change my middle name to "awesome" or "bitch"?  I mean awesome would obviously be cooler.  Can you imagine people saying "You know that chick? Her middle name is 'awesome.'"   While, bitch would obviously be more accurate, let's be honest.

But right now I am way too focused on the geriatric man in front of me wearing MBT sneakers.  It's a little late in life to tone your tush asshole!

Jury duty is not the new black.